Changes and Futures and Confusion and Wishes

Everything is changing so fast that I can't keep up. Life's not passing me by; it's trying to run me over. My sister is leaving for college in three weeks, to live on her own in a different city, on a different piece of land, with her own life, and it makes me think. It's not long until I go, and time passes so fast. Me and some of my best friends were talking about that, after this stepping up thing we had a couple of weeks ago. It's kind of like a rite of passage, that ceremony, even though its stupid and little. And the four of us were all talking about where we were going after we graduated, and what we were going to do with our lives, and it was weird and scary and exciting and happy all at once. I do know what I really want to do: I want to be a creative writing teacher. Not in schools, where you need a teaching degree, but extracurricular classes, or working with Gifted kids. I know that there's nowhere near the amount of stuff that Gifted kids should have, especially in high school. You only really get Gifted stuff from Gr.4-6, and thats it. I wish that I'd had that opportunity, to have writing classes.
But to be a creative writing teacher, you need to have written something, something published and relatively impressive, or any time you try for a job, you get laughed at. And I do want to write. I want to write more than anything in the world; writing is a default state for me, and it is the thing I love most in the world, but I just don't see how that could really happen.